Coffee, self portraits, and a mom confession

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Today I needed a mommy timeout.

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Aspen woke up on the wrong side of the bed. She was fussy and clingy, and very irritable (not sick). I would look at her the wrong way and she would start screaming and crying. I would try to brush my teeth, and she would be pulling on my shirt telling me, “NO” while hitting me. If I wasn’t holding her in my arms, she was mad.

Aspen’s love language during her early years is clearly Physical Touch. I have acknowledged this for a while now (If you haven’t read The Five Love Languages, I highly suggest you do! It helps all relationships, not just marriages). She needs to be touching, skin to skin, in order to do nearly anything. When she wakes up in the morning, she requests to cuddle for the first ten minutes of her day. Throughout the day her hands are always close to mine, and in the evenings she will not close her eyes without me keeping near. As for me, physical touch is not my forte. I actually can’t stand it. I have never been a hugger (unless hugs from my mom?), and I like to keep my distance from people. I don’t like it, and I never have. BUT, motherhood is calling me to learn how to like it.

Long story short, I raised my voice several times throughout the day. Actually, no, I YELLED several times throughout the day. Finally, towards the end, I had to sit back and think about how I was handling this situation. She is a toddler, I am an adult. I have known for a while that physical touch helps her relax. I also see that yelling has done nothing except make her more upset. Eventually, after a quick little mommy timeout, I changed my attitude and went to love and cuddle my emotionally vulnerable toddler. We are all entitled to a few bad days. And it definitely helps to have a mom who can *eventually* be self aware and help you get through your emotions.

Moms, fathers, grandparents, siblings, wife, and husbands, I encourage you all to pick up The Five Love Languages and find out how you can love your dear ones better today.


As for self portraits- I think it is something so wonderful to be able to document your daily life. It’s something no one in the past has been able to do to this extent before. As technology evolves, history does too. Each physical photograph is a documentation of our lives that someone will someday find. In a selfie, and narcissistic perceived world, take time to document your emotions and your actions, not just your looks.


This is one of my favorite button down blouses that I’ve owned. It is soft, light weight, and fits so well! Shop it here

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Wine not Wednesday vol.1

Adding on to Sunday’s coffee chats, I will also be starting up another series called “Wine not Wednesday”. On these days, I will be going over other hot topics in my life. These may range from podcasts I listen to, conversations about marriage, motherhood, my dog, and so much more!

Today’s topic: How I’m currently dealing with tantrums

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Today I am drinking Target’s $5 California Roots Chardonnay

Okay, I don’t know about you guys, but Aspen was a perfect baby. She slept through the night by three weeks old, was never fussy, never had troubles nursing or gaining weight, and was all over PERFECT. And then toddlerhood hit. And don’t get me wrong, in terms of toddlerhood, she really isn’t that bad (yet), but I will admit that there have been numerous days that I’ve had to hit my knees praying because I was at a complete loss with my parenting.

Mama, I get it. And I promise you are not alone in this.

Whenever I offer advice, it’s not because I am an expert. I am so beyond far from being a perfect mom, but I will on the occasion share what has worked for me and what has not.

So, let’s talk tantrums.

Recently Aspen has been entering the tantrum phase. You’d think I would be used to this by now, with the years I spent in childcare and all. But no, it is SO different as a full time mama. There are days I have to put her in her room to calm down, and then I turn right around to do the same for me. I LITERALLY HAVE TO PUT MYSELF IN A MOMMY TIMEOUT to calm down so I don’t overreact to the fact that my daughter is just being a toddler.

Keep in mind, over reacting and reacting are two very separate things.

So what do I do when I go to get my upset toddler out of time out? I get on her level, look her dead in the eyes, and tell her that I lover her no matter what. And then I proceed to tell her (calmly, might I add), that although I love her unconditionally, that does not mean that I will excuse her behavior. So then I remind her of what she did to deserve that time out in the first place, and then I make her repeat “I’m sorry mommy. I promise I won’t do ________ again. I love you”. And then I give her a hug and kiss, and we go on with our day.

Y’all, motherhood can be hard. I mean, it is such a beautiful journey and I love every second of it, but that does not mean it doesn’t kick my ass some days. Hang in there, you’re not alone. And I promise I am praying for you and your little family’s journey.

Every day casual

As a mama, I like to be comfortable. Each day I am bending down to grab toys, giving piggy backs, kissing boo boos, cleaning up messes, and giving baths. It’s not for the faint of heart, nor is it glamorous. But, being a woman, I also like to look presentable and on the occasion, good, even while I am mommin’.

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Aspen, while running around outside, fell on some cement and scraped her knee. Immediate she looked up to me, asking me to pick her up. I naturally scooped her into my arms as she buried her face into my shoulder and whispered, “I oh-tay mama”. And instantly my heart melted.

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Guys, motherhood is the sweetest. I mean, good Lord, how could it not be when your kid is this dang cute? Don’t get me wrong, she drives me mad some days (basically every day after 6pm, especially when dad isn’t home to help). There have been days where I have had to put her into her room while I hit my knees praying for grace, because sometimes parenting is hard. But at the end of the day, when I look at her sleeping face, I could not imagine a life so perfect. I wouldn’t trade this for anything (even to go to the bathroom by myself).


Sadie’s Outfit

Top is from target // denim is from American Eagle // Flats are from Charolette Russe // Similar necklase can be found here //

Aspen’s Outfit

Dress and knee high socks are from Old Navy // flats are from Target // Similar hair accessory here

 

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Nana visits part 1. + Halloween recap

 

So, my mom is in town.

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My mom arrived from Arizona last Saturday evening. It’s been far too long since her last visit. Actually, I believe I was still pregnant during her last trip here. So, it’s been a while. My mom and I are also best friends, so going more than a few months without seeing her nearly kills me. Our last girls trip together was over six months ago, which is far too long for me. Anyway, she’s here, and I couldn’t be happier. And neither could Aspen! So far, we have gone to Boo at the Zoo, pumpkin patch, out to local eateries, parks, and of course, the beach. It’s kind of ironic how I am obsessed with mountain landscapes, but live in Florida, and how my mom is obsessed with the coastal lines, but lives in Arizona.

We still have plans to go out for champagne at one of the waterfront resorts, and to walk some nature trails befrore she heads home in a few more days.


 

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Halloween was a blast with this little one. We spent the day running errands, and got home right in time to cook up a delicious stuffed “jack-o-lantern” for dinner (link here). Afterwards I tried to get a few cute shots of her in her halloween dress, but as you can see, that did not go as well as I had hoped. This kid wanted nothing to do with taking pictures. And by the time I finally got her to hold still, she decided it was the perfect time to poop!

After these pictures were taken, we dressed Aspen up in her Mickey Mouse costume and put pillows and blankets in her wagon, as well as her candy bucket. The rest of the night, she lounged comfortably in her wagon, saying “trick or treat!” or “more nana?” while my mom hand fed her m&ms. It was a hilarious sight and perfectly describes my daughter.

I can’t wait to see how we celebrate next year!

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Aspen’s first birthday

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What the flying HECK! One year already? This has been the fastest year of my life, as well as  the best. March 25th, 2016 was the absolute most glorious (and painful) day of my life. I active labored (with back labor) for seven hours, and pushed for two. Every second of it was excruciating, but every second was worth it. At 1:16pm Aspen graced us with her presence and our lives would forever change for the better.

I’m not going to lie, this year has been difficult. There have been a few times where I have just wanted to break down and cry from lack of sleep, or not being able to go out with friends, or having to wear a pad when I run now because I pee myself when I move too much. There’s just a lot that changes with your body and lifestyle after having a child that can tear you down after a while. But on another note, I have the dreamiest child who is so kind hearted and loving, and loves to cuddle and gives the sweetest kisses as well as read books and play outside. She is the sweetest thing to walk into our lives, and now I am so grateful for every moment we have with her.

We kept it simple for her birthday. A few friends came over and we ate street tacos and red velvet cupcakes, took pictures, opened presents, and watched while aspen destroyed her smash cake (we were very proud). Afterwards, she took a good two hour nap, and then proceeded to share pasta and a cheese cake with me for dinner.

I still can’t believe it’s been a year. My heart is so full of love for this child that it nearly feels like she has been by my side my entire life, but in the same breath, it feels like she entered our lives just yesterday. I am beyond honored that God had chosen me to mother her, and is giving us another year of her spunk, independence, cuddles, and love.

St Patricks day with the Becks

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Happy St. Patty’s day!

So, prior to getting pregnant and birthing Aspen, whisky was my jam. I mean, not to brag or anything, but I could hang. But these days, not so much. But I’ll attempt to drink something other than wine for the holiday. We’ll see how it pans out.

Anyhow, today Aspen and I went to Target to pick out some of her birthday gifts (I’m so excited, guys!), and then to the park at the beach to burn off some energy. Which worked wonders, because she took a pretty decent nap in her car seat.

Also, I got this super cute pelum style shirt from old navy for only $7! Shop it here.

You can also shop Aspens bow here

How’d you celebrate your St Patty’s day?

spring fun, pink eye, and why we don’t want much for Aspen’s birthday

 

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Spring is upon us, and I for one, am thrilled! Spring is my favorite season for many reasons. One being, it’s mine and Aspen’s birthday season! Two, the weather is absolutely perfect; and three, it’s gardening season!

This week has been rough for us. So, so rough. Aspen is teething, has a cold, AND had pink eyes in both eyes. Three sleepless nights, and five incredibly difficult and clingy days nearly made me lose my mind. We were home bound from the pink eye for a few days, which really puts a damper on my mood because I am a busy body. I love being on the move and exploring and doing a million and one things throughout the day. But I have a feeling God was like, “hey girl, you obviously wont slow down on your own, so here’s a little bit of pink eye to FORCE you to learn how to relax.”

Most people know that I am not huge on Aspen watching loads of TV. She is only eleven months old anyway, and I just feel like there is so much more we can do to entertain ourselves and let our childrens immagination grow than sitting in front of a screen all day. But it’s hard to stay home three days in a row without wanting to watch all three seasons of Super Why just to keep her quiet for a few hours. But as tempting as it was, I opted out (most of the time). Instead, we gardened, colored, played in our yard, read dozens of books, and visited quiet beaches.

Now she is feeling much better, and we are back to our crazy schedule of constantly moving and having fun. But during this home bound period, as short lived as it was, it reminded me how great minimalism is for children. We have a few house toys she plays with throughout our indoor time, but more often than not, I want her to explore her outdoor surroundings and continue to grow her gross and fine motor skills. She’s about to turn one year old in a few weeks, and I keep thinking of what we want as gifts. And to be completely honest, we don’t really need or want anything. However, to appease those who insist on gifting, we have made a small list of things we think would benefit her experiences, but beyond these few items I feel it is a waste of time, money, and room in our small minimalistic home. Besides, there are dozens of studies out there saying that too many toys actually overwhelms a child and hinders their immagination and creativity. Instead, we’d prefer:

  1. A wagon- for our walks around the neighborhood when she wants to collect all the flowers and pine cones we cross paths with.
  2. books- Aspen loves nothing more than story time. I’m serious, her favorite is Brown Bear Brown Bear. I read it fifteen times in one day because she insisted. And I’m a firm believer that there’s no such thing as too many books.
  3. An evolving tricycle- These look so fun! And it grows with them, so it’ll last a while.
  4. craft box- As she gets older she finds more and more interest in creating. I think a small craft box where we can store crayons, paper, paint, yarn, etc. would benefit her creativity and indoor time for quite a while.
  5. Water table- These are perfect for the hot summer days ahead of us, and are great for sensory play!

At the end of the day, we want to be intentional parents. To us, teaching Aspen that less is sometimes more is a great lesson about life. I’m sure there will be a ton of disagreements on how we parent our child, but that just comes with parenthood during the age of social media. But please, know that we are diliberately not making a big list for a reason. And respecting mom and dad’s wishes are always appreciated.

So, outside of discussing our minimalistic birthday wishes, we are anticipating a beautiful few weeks of spring-time fun before Scott leaves for deployment. What’s your favorite thing to do in the Spring?